How to Rekindle a Friendship
Some friendships last a lifetime and some fade. Whether you have fallen out of touch due a move, change in life circumstances or an argument, that doesn’t mean the friendship is lost.
“Friendships can get us through the hard times and make the good times even more enjoyable,” said Dr. Deborah Krahl. “It is always worth reaching out to someone, who m may simply be waiting for your call.”
If you are interested in reconnecting with a former friend, the following tips can help you take the first steps:
- Let the dust settle, if necessary. If you lost your friend due to a disagreement or conflict, give yourself and your friend time to cool off. Process your own emotions and make sure you are ready to reestablish communication before you reach out. If applicable, make sure you are ready to apologize or forgive, and then move on.
- Make the first move. Fortunately, the options for reaching out today are pretty limitless. You can keep it casual and try to reconnect through social media with a quick Facebook hello or pick up the phone for a call if you are in need of a more in-depth conversation. A handwritten card can also be a beautiful gesture that gives the other person the chance to respond in time. The first step is always being available and showing your interest in rekindling the friendship.
- Make a plan – but move slowly. If you and your friend had a shared interest – a yoga class, a certain kind of music, a particular author or cuisine – this offers a great chance to get together and reconnect. Again, depending on the circumstances that stalled your friendship, this process may make time. When you are both ready, make a plan for getting back together.
- Recognize that the friendship will have changed. Particularly if you haven’t been in touch in years or decades, both of you – and your friendship – will have changed. Don’t expect everything to be exactly the way it was before; rather, take the time to get to know this person as he or she is right now.
- Stay in touch. We are all busy, that’s for sure, but friendship involves time and effort. Even if you don’t get together or talk every week, show your friend that you care about your relationship with a quick hello, card, kind gesture or invitation.